Too late to train?

[cdeep22]

Ok, a little back story (please indulge me):

I had two birds, a male(4 years) and a female (3 years) ... the male was tame and the female (the 2nd bird in the mix) was not.

A few weeks ago, the male sadly passed away, leaving me with the untamed female.

My basic question is ... is it possible to tame a bird after it's been in this enviornment for 3 years?

It's not like a rescue bird which suddenly comes into my realm, it's a bird that's been here (and decidedly been distant) for 3 years already and has chosen to not bond with me.

A little background for this female budgie:

It was never totally "loving" towards either it's owner (me) or it's mate (the deceased "Eli"), opting to angrily peck at the aforementioned male budgie whenever said male budgie was having fun. Basically, I feel that this budgie is a solitary bird who doesn't care for anyone/thing else but itself.

I've had budgies all my life (6 in total) and this is the most, for lack of a better word, reclusive one of the bunch.

I've tried repeatedly (and for hours a day) recently to bond with this bird, but to no avail. I've blinked to her. I've offered her millet from my hand. I've tried the universal "step up" routine. But, nothing. She doesn't bite, but when I approach her with an outstretched finger, she "tenses up" , leaning back from the perch which she's on like I'm the boogie man. It's like I'm back in elementary school and have the "cooties."

Ideally, I'd like to get a 2nd bird again (for myself and her), but I must say that I honestly believe that she's happier being solo. She was never one for vocalization, but I see her "bopping" her head more now than when she had Eli with her (by the way, Eli, who's in my avatar, was a totally selfless bird who always looked out for her, but got nothing but an angry peck in return). She's quiet now, as always .. living a seemingly boring life. I don't want to bring it another "loving" budgie into the mix, just to have him/her abused by this scoundrel. But, truth be told, I don't want this bird alone either. To me, it's nothing more than the dreaded "ornament" bird as it is.

So, what would you do?

[Scully]

I have a simular young female, who at the moment is having time out in the avairy. Trouble is if you get a young boy, she could bully him, and you need a young one to tame.
It sounds like you are home with her most of the day? so its not like shes totally alone. Is it possible for you to buy a young male, and another cage so they can sit side by side?
You can then concentrate on taming a new bird, but when they are out together, you can also keep an eye on her.

[Billie]

Hi Cdeep22

I have found female budgies to be more reserved in general than the males. How about trying a mirror in the cage, see if the image of another bird makes a positive difference to her behaviour. She can then 'choose' when she has company.

It is a shame to hear you haven't bonded with her, but sometimes things just take a while. Rather than hopping from one technique to another just stick with one for a good long while. Sit near the cage talking to her but not looking at her, maybe read outloud something like that. If she responds, then offer a food treat but from the OUTSIDE of the cage, so she feels safe. Once she comes to you for a food treat, then move on to offering the food from with in the cage. I go for holding the food on a nearby perch rather than looming up to the bird, food in hand which would appear threataning.

If you are kind, gentle and patient things should improve. I have had females that never did hand tame but would come to the cage bars for food. They are all individuals like people not all will do what you want, but you have to earn their trust and be happy with what they offer you.

My bird Blue is the only one of my five budgies who didn't want to step up or have anything to do with me. I've had her 2 years now, in time she would take food and would then take food offered within the cage. I have gradually been able to put my finger closer and closer to her, not asking her to step up just getting nearer. She learnt that I wasn't a threat and a couple of weeks ago she stepped up for the first time.

If you are patient and work slowly you can get results, just accept that not all birds want hands on kinda love.

Billie

[Liz]

Hey there!

Scully and Billy have some great suggestions! From talking to other budgie owners, and from personal experience however, I would say that the chances of you getting this hen "tame", are pretty slim. I recently tried to make friends with a 6 month old budgie, but even this was too old, apparently. He just kept getting more and more frustrated and depressed with just me around, so I let him be with the other budgies. Obviously, there are going to be exceptions, so I wouldn't give up just yet, but I think that it is quite possible that she just isn't a "people" bird.

It is great that you are taking time to consider all this, don't feel guilty if she never really seems to get attached to you. It is obvious that you want to do the best by her! She is lucky to have you. ;D